.Editor's Note: The adhering to is actually the text message of a character coming from Exploration 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reflecting on the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I have not created significantly regarding specifics of this purpose in the course of the month I've been actually below, generally for two main reasons: the first being actually that there has actually been really little bit of time to carry out that sort of composing, as well as second of all due to the fact that I am actually uncertain exactly how comfy I am actually sharing thoughts I share with family and friends along with the rest of the globe.Properly, definitely the globe transformed today. What I state or even carry out is quite minor contrasted to the importance of what happened to our nation today when it was actually assaulted through ... by whom? Terrorists is all we know, I think. Challenging to know at whom to point our temper and also worry ...I had actually simply completed an amount of activities this morning, one of the most lengthy being the physical examinations of all team members. In a private chat complying with that, the trip specialist told me they were actually possessing a very bad day on the ground. I possessed no concept ...He explained the situation to me as finest he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was made speechless, then terrified. My first idea was that this wasn't a genuine talk, that I was actually still listening to some of my Tom Clancy strips. It merely failed to appear achievable on this scale in our nation. I couldn't even imagine the details, also before the information of further damage began can be found in.Vladimir came over rather rapidly, sensing that one thing incredibly serious was actually being discussed. I swayed Michael in to the module as well. They were also amazed and stunned. After our experts signed off, I attempted to clarify to Vladimir as well as Michael as finest I can the prospective enormity of the show of fear in midtown Manhattan and also at the Government. They clearly understood and were really considerate.I glanced at the Globe Chart on the computer to view where over the world our experts were actually and also observed that we were actually happening southeast out of Canada and would be actually skipping New England in a few minutes. I zoomed around the station till I found a home window that will offer me a view of New York City and snatched the closest video camera. It took place to be a camera, and I was actually appearing south from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to possess a strange bloom to it at the foundation of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the metropolitan area. After going through some of the newspaper article our experts merely obtained, I believe we were taking a look at NY around the amount of time of, or even quickly after, the failure of the second high rise. Just how horrible ...I swung the cam all along the East Shoreline to the south to observe if I could view every other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or even anywhere else, but nothing was visible.It was fairly tough to think about work afterwards, though we possessed some to perform, however on the next track our company crossed the United States more southern. All 3 people were working 1 or 2 electronic cameras to attempt to acquire views of New york city or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, but no certain resource can be seen. Everything appeared fabulous coming from a couple of hundred miles away. I can't visualize the heartbreaking settings on the ground.Apart from the emotional influence of our country being dealt with and also countless our consumers and perhaps some close friends being actually killed, the absolute most overwhelming emotion being where I am is one of isolation.Upcoming day ... I reckon the fatigue and also psychological pressure acquired the very best of me. I could not keep awake and also remain to create. Today was actually still difficult, however our team began getting more details, plus we had the honor of chatting directly along with the Center Director, Roy Estess, that assured us that the ground teams would certainly remain to operate and ensure our protection, and also the risk-free operation of the Station. Our team additionally talked to our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that included that the partners in the Plan are all entirely devoted to carrying on secure operations as well as help. These were actually certainly never inquiries for me. I understand all these folks! The ground groups have been astonishingly encouraging, extremely understanding of the impact of the updates, and also have actually attempted to be as practical as achievable. They have all been actually incredibly specialist as well as centered though I can't envision the distraction of the kind of updates coming in and the thought that government properties might be in danger. They never bypassed a beat, even when moving control centers. And also a group of elderly employees and good friends provided our team a fairly thorough instruction about what was recognized and what was being performed in the authorities and at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually quite practical as well as type of all of them to carry out in the midst of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has actually additionally been actually encouraging as well as helpful, trying to uplink news articles when our own resources were inoperable, as well as pointing out kind words ...My crewmates have been wonderful, also. They understand it is actually been a tough time for me and also the folks on the ground, and they have actually tried to become as also keeled and beneficial as feasible. Michael even fixed me my beloved Borscht soup for supper. And they offer me plenty of space to presume when I required it. They are actually extremely considerate as well as of course outraged at whoever will perform this.I understand many folks in Washington, a lot of individuals that take a trip to DC and also New York City, plenty of who are captains, that I really felt sure I will get at the very least a handful of items of problem over the upcoming few days. I received the 1st one today when I found out that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that hit the Pentagon was actually Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I found Chic throughout plebe summertime when our experts remained in the D&B all together, and also our company possessed considerable amounts of classes with each other. I can not imagine what he has to of experienced, and also now I listen to that he may possess increased further than our team can even consider by potentially preventing his airplane from being the one to tackle the White Property. What a terrible loss, however I'm sure Chic was combating bravely throughout. And tears don't flow the exact same in space ...It's complicated to illustrate just how it feels to become the only United States entirely off the earth at a time including this. The sensation that I must be there with every one of you, managing this, aiding somehow, is actually frustrating. I know that we perform the threshold (or past) of a horrible switch in the past of the planet. Several things will definitely certainly never coincide again after September 11, 2001. Not merely for the manies thousand and also thousands of folks directly had an effect on by these horrible actions of terrorism, however probably for all of us. We will find our own selves really feeling in different ways concerning lots of traits, featuring possibly area exploration, however.It's dreadful to view smoke putting from injuries in your very own nation from such a fantastic point of view. The duality of performing a space capsule committed to strengthening daily life on the planet and viewing lifestyle being damaged by such conscious, dreadful acts is actually jolting to the subconscious, no matter that you are actually. And also the know-how that every little thing will be actually various than when our team introduced by the time our company land is a little bit of disconcerting. I believe in our nation and also in our management that our experts will definitely carry out every little thing possible to better defend her as well as our family members, and to carry justice wherefore has actually been actually carried out. I possess peace of mind that the excellent individuals at NASA will certainly carry out everything important to continue our purpose safely and also return our company securely at the right time. And also I miss every one of you significantly. I can't exist along with you in person, as well as our team have a very long way to go to accomplish our mission, but be actually particular that my heart is actually along with you, and also recognize you are in my petitions.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An upgrade to the final letter ... Luckily, it is actually been a busy full week up right here. And also to show that, like our country, our team are actually advancing our intended pathway along with service customarily (as high as achievable). Tonight the latest enhancement to the station, the Russian Docking Chamber will certainly be released coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday evening (US opportunity), it will dock along with our team, at a slot never used prior to on the nadir side of the Service Component. This brand new module will certainly offer our team an additional spot to dock a Development or even Soyuz and will certainly supply a huge airlock with 2 useable hatches for carrying out EVA's in Russian Orlan matches, which our team are going to do a few of before our team come home.The complication prior to in coping with today was inadequate information. The issue today is too much. It arrived simultaneously when email was recovered, and also there's not enough time to read all of it! Plus it is actually too difficult to handle all of it instantly. But I cherish receiving it, and I actually value the great characters of help as well as friendship I am actually obtaining.Our experts are actually succeeding aboard, receiving our job performed, and also referring to factors. Final evening our experts had a long dialogue over dinner regarding the value of these celebrations, the achievable activities to comply with, as well as what should be carried out. After dinner, Michael challenged telling me that every e-mail he got from buddies in Russia stated particularly to inform me exactly how regretful they were that this occurred, expanding their condolences, as well as talking to just how I was actually carrying out. Vladimir instructed me the Russian term for "condolences" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar Area. (Both the Russian as well as the English words are considerably extremely long to articulate simply.) Extremely type individuals.For the last two days, the Russian MCC has sufficed to transfer real-time programs of radio updates concerning the activity as well as connected accounts, to ensure I was actually effectively notified. Every professional that has begun the line to cover an operation or a complication has at some factor prolonged greetings to me with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom informed our team that due to the special day of remembrance in the United States, all day folks had been carrying blossoms as well as lining all the wall surfaces of the United States consular office in Moscow, and this night they were lighting candle lights in the road outside the consular office. Exactly how the planet has modified.Folks almost everywhere seem to acknowledge the senselessness and also scary within this attack. As well as the remarkable reduction. Moscow has taken care of these sort of concerns in the final handful of years with house and also metro bombings, so they are actually as anxious to get rid of this hazard as our team are actually. However all-time low collection is that there are good folks everywhere that would like to live in tranquility. I check out that a little one talked to, "America is actually so great to other countries, our team constantly help everyone, how can they despise our team a great deal?".I wish the example of teamwork and also depend on that this spacecraft plus all individuals in the course show daily will sooner or later motivate the remainder of the planet to function the same way. They must!Unfortunately, our company will not be flying over the United States during the time folks are lighting candles. Do not recognize if we might find that in any case. Our experts performed, nevertheless, view a really uncommon and also gorgeous sight a couple of moments ago: the launch of our Docking Chamber on a Soyuz booster. We were surpassing it and also it emerged regarding three mins after its own launch from Baikonur as the sun attacked our terminal, so it was actually still at night. It looked like a big comet with a directly, large rear silhouetted versus the dark earth underneath. Regardless of some bad lights for some time as the sunlight reached our window at a reduced viewpoint, I took care of some video clip of it as first our experts passed the rocket, and after that viewed it begin to mesmerize as it gained height as well as speed. I filmed until principal motor cutoff and booster separation developed just as we moved toward sunup on the Himalayas. An unforgettable view in an extraordinary full week ...Lifestyle happens, even precede. Our experts are actually right here to keep ... Frank.